What you can't have is what you'll learn to love
by Contriago
Summary: This is for all the Loki fans, happy new year let me know if you like it please. rated MA for sexual themes from the beginning.
1. Chapter 1

"Why couldn't I be more like, Thor?" I asked myself. "well it's simple I highly doubt I could behave that long."

I grabbed my bag and moved to the worlds opening.

"Going out again Loki?" Heimdall's voice called behind me.

"I wouldn't be here if I wasn't now would I Heimdall?" Loki retorted back.

"What do you do down there I cannot see you?" Heimdall asked.

"I do nothing that concerns you."

"I could easily find out."

Loki quickly turned to see Heimdall leaning on his sword a smug smile on his face.

"I highly doubt you could." Loki smirked back.

"Very well your highness." Heimdall stepped forward and opened the door to Midgard.

I could smell the fresh air even from up here. I took a deep breath in and felt the tight pull as it took me down to Midgard below. Just great it was raining heavily.

No matter I would soon be at the bar and the rain would no longer be able to reach me. Despite the heavy downpour there were several couples who were out in the street dancing in it. There were a few here and there that would run through it and pause at an underpass or a small covering at a street store. But soon they would run to another and then another in a small attempt to get home. Loki laughed at them if only they weren't so stupid they would understand that it would be quicker and warmer just to get soaked go home and get changed rather than waste there time trying to stay dry and get there. Finally after his short walk down the block Loki had made it to the red fox inn. A bar that had only girls for servers. Loki liked this bar in particular because many men didn't come here, they couldn't touch the women, the men weren't even able to hand them money, all tips were to be put in a jar at the bar. Loki liked to have what he couldn't have.

"ah, just like the golden apples of youth. I took those without much trouble this should be just as easy."

a woman in her usual blue sleeveless dress noticed Loki and waved to him before walking toward him.

"Well, well, well, back again there lonely man?" The girl asked him as he sat himself down on the closest table.

"Of course, where else would I go?" He joked.

"To other bars like all the other men do." She leaned down giving Loki a wonderful peak of her bare chest.

"That's very unfair, Vivian."

"why cause you can't touch and I can."

"No, your teasing me knowing I could never do anything."

"Do you have a name lonely man?" she asked standing back up.

"It's uh...it's Loki." he said.

"Loki." she scoffed, "like the Norse god of mischief?"

"yes just like the Norse god of mischief."

"you sound like a dangerous man, Loki. I'll bring you your drink." she winked at him, before turning and leaving. Loki reached down and adjusted himself in his pants before turning to see if anyone else had noticed the two of them. No one had.

"You're as good as mine Vivian."

Loki watched her from a distance for a while and then began to stare after the other girls, yes they were all beautiful but in Loki's head none would be more fun than Vivian. She seemed to be the one that wanted it. She would always be the one to push guys over the edge if they came in always teasing them as if to offer herself and then change her mind. None of the others did what she did always flashing herself top and bottom, Loki loved her ass. She seemed to flash him the most though the other men were always on accident. Or so it seemed to him.

He waited till it was late around one in the morning when all the other parties left it was just him left at the bar. Everyone else had gotten drunk and went home to sleep off the after effects.

"Do you need a stronger drink?" Mira asked. She was in a short jean skirt with nothing on top but a bandana tied tight strangling her breasts beneath. This irritated Loki her chest didn't quit look right.

"No." he said and started swirling his drink around.

"You can wait around all night for any of us but we all leave together for safety. You'll never even get to talk to one of us alone." Mira said staring after Loki.

"Who said I wanted to talk to one of you. I'm here just for eye candy."

"no man ever just comes in here for eye candy especially when it comes to Vivian." Mira said. Loki smiled and continued to swirl the drink in his glass until the quiet awkwardness began to drive him mad.

"Is there something else you'd like to ask or speak with me about or are you just standing there to purposely make me leave."

"i don't have anything to say but..." she sat down next to him and without warning she had Loki by his balls. He jumped in his seat spilling his drink.

Mira sat there laughing at him and he cleared his throat and sat up straighter.

"i didn't know you were so hard or sensitive." she giggled.

"Mira, I think it's time you left me alone."

"But I thought you wanted something."

"Why...why would you think that I simply came in here for a drink."

"You come in here every night ogling everyone here and your always the last one out I thought that maybe you wanted some form of release." with that Mira stood and ran back to the bar. Loki's throbbing member hurting him more than it had in the last week needed its release so standing he quietly moved to the bathroom. Never in his life had he been so sexually frustrated. Pulling his pants down he grabbed his member harshly and with his other hand holding himself up on the wall he began to stroke himself. Faster and faster he hand slide over himself and with each thought of Vivian he got closer and closer. Moaning he gave himself a few more strokes before he found his release.

"Damn it, I was trying to save that." he growled and pulled his pants back up.  
He exited the bathroom and sat back down at his seat his drink was still there but the mess was gone, he looked over to see Mira staring at him. Pulling out his wallet he pulled out a five and dropped it on the table before exiting the bar.

It had stopped raining but the smell was still there. As Loki walked up the street he could feel that someone was watching him. He smirked and walked up a street that he knew would turn into a dead end. He stopped at the end and turned to see a girl in a rather familiar bandana top and a short jean skirt.

"Why are you following me Mira?" he asked coldly.

"I don't know i'm just interested in you."

"Many girls are interested in me but none have been stupid enough to actually try to follow me home. You should go back to the club before you or I get into trouble." Loki said.

"But..."

"There are no buts, would it help if I told you I was not interested in you, the way you are interested in me?"

tears began to stream down her face and she quickly turned and began to run away from Loki.

Smiling he turned and looking up shouted, "Heimdall open the gate."

with a flash of light Loki felt the familiar tug that would bring him back to his home. Heimdall stared after loki as he stepped off the gates doorway.

"What?" Loki asked almost out of breath.

"Your a bit sweaty for just exploring down there."

"i went for a run."

"Sure you did, and I went to sleep on my watch. If there is one thing I know about you loki its that you are a good liar."

"and an even better brother." came a voice from the doorway.

Loki and heimdall turned to see thor standing there.

"Thor how nice of you to meet me down here at the gate as I returned." Loki turned with his arms open wide inviting Thor in for a hug but all he got was a sharp slap to the face.

Loki stared at the floor in disbelief.

"You didn't come to my birthday party. I told you and reminded you all week. Mother even told you again yesterday. Sif bought you a present to wrap for me the day before yesterday. And yet you still missed it brother. Do I mean nothing to you?"

"It's not that you don't mean anything to me thor it's just I thought it would be better if I had you all to myself later so we could celebrate by ourselves, you know you and me alone time."

"are you for real, loki your silver tongue crap doesn't work on me." Thor turned and walked away.

"I didn't miss it on purpose Heimdall I just needed to get out of this place for a while, why doesn't he understand he sometimes goes down there to see that girl jane."

"He was there for your birthday though, and he skipped seeing jane that day altogether wether he was sick of being up here all day or not he still skipped seeing her to be with you. Give him sometime, then come apologize tomorrow, take him so see the shooting stars he loves to watch those. Make sure you are there for him in the future though he may not be as forgiving." heimdall said.

Loki went straight to his room after that and laid down, but it was no use visions of Vivian rolled in and his member grew hard again. Loki needed to get vivian up here somehow without Odin and thor knowing about it. He needed his release and his hand was getting to familiar.

"oh, vivian" he moaned before ripping open his pants and grabbing his hard member. He remembered the perfect curve of her breasts and the nipples that stuck out sweetly as if asking him to suck on them. He began to stroke himself and felt himself build quickly. He was ready to cum but he grabbed the bed sheets hard and bit his tongue.

"i refuse to cum like this one more time I promised myself I would get her up here. I've waited but she won't come up here on her own. I guess it will have to be against her own will." teasing himself he gently rubbed the head of himself and just as he was about to cum again he quickly grabbed the sheets refusing his release.

"You wanna cum you better think of way to get her up here."

for the rest of the night loki would tease himself, threatening at least three hours of this each night that she wasn't here.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Loki stroked himself gently and then when he was close to his release stopped and moaned thrusting into the air for any form of contact, but none came and his closeness would go back down his body was soaked and so were his sheets. He stopped and breathed for a moment when he notice a small drizzle of light shine through his bedroom curtain, it was morning, he had teased himself all night. Slowly he sat up his body was weak from his teasing.

"For another time then." he said looking down at his rather hard member. "Let's get you dressed and with that loki stood and pulled off his ripped jeans before changing into some clean ones.

He was shaking as he walked but that couldn't be helped.

He moved to the bathroom to wash the sweat off his face when he froze.

"Brother, oh brother." Thor's all but familiar voice called behind loki's door.

"Yes, dear brother?" Loki called back.

"you promised me the whole day lets go." Thor said.

"i'm still getting ready give me a moment. Do you know what you want to do today."

"I hadn't thought much about it, do you have something planned?"

"oh I don't know what if we went down to the shores and watched the shooting stars like we used to when we were little?" loki asked while he filled his bathroom sink with warm water.

"You remembered that?" Thor asked.

"Of course I remember that. It was I who went with you every night remember."

"Of course."

loki quickly washed his face and dried it before moving to the door. He took a deep breath and opened it.

Thor stared after loki as he walked by. When loki noticed that thor was not following her turned and stared back at his brothers startled face.

"what?" Loki asked.

"You look exhausted as though you hadn't slept."

"I had some bad nightmares last night is all. I'm fine really." loki said.

"Alright so to the shores."

"to the shores."

Loki walked quietly beside thor as they made there way to the shores of valhalla.

"Loki, what I am about to tell you is important I want you to listen to me. Father and mother have been worried about you. You come and go to midgard everyday for hours. Heimdall says you won't tell him whats going on and sif, well shes says you've been ignoring her altogether. I thought you and her were gonna go out you asked her out once took her out and now you're not even talking to her. You missed my birthday to go down there. I understand that you were upset about jane and I getting together, because of her we don't spend as much time together but that just means we need to find time for eachother."

Loki slowed his pace as he listened.

"it's not any of those things I just, ever since I found out I was not odin's true son it hit hard, I feel less like part of the family, so I've been trying to stay away to see if you guys really do love me and I can tell that you all do. So here I am struggling in the middle."

"Oh, Loki your more than a brother to me without the flesh and blood to prove you are."

"Thank you for being so kind but I don't feel that way..." loki stopped walking and kicked as red round stone that stood in his path. "i feel detached."

"I'm sorry you feel that way perhaps with time those feelings shall pass."

"I hope so." Loki said and then they both began to walk down the path again.

"By the way I hope you don't mind I invited sif to join us. I was hoping to get the two of you back together the two of you seemed so happy about it at first. And then after the date it was as though you hated the world."

"Whatever you want thor. It's your birthday thing."

they had nearly reached the shore by now and thor bumped loki's arm before shouting, "I'll race you to the shore."

Thor took off in a dash of speed, taken aback loki laughed and took off after thor. He passed thor easily and paused as he reached the middle of the shore where sif stood.

"Long time no see, prick." sif sneered.

"Nice to see you to sif." Loki snapped back with equal venom.

"Oh, stop it you've been together a total of three minuets and you're already fighting.

"tell him to be nice."

"Me you be nice you old snake."

"Old?!"

"That's enough the both of you or I leave." thor shouted.

"Sit down both of you."

sif sat down before loki even moved. Once she was seated, thor sat down next to her and loki sat on the opposite side of thor.

They all looked up at the sky above thousand and thousand of lights big and small shone back through a pink blue and black background and all over in different areas you could see a flash here and a flash there.

"what did you get thor, loki, or didn't you get him something. Oh, thats right you let your girlfriend pick it out and buy it for you and then you dump her and avoid her without so much as a single reason why."

"that does it i'm going in you two can stay out here till your differences are resolved that's an order and i'm telling father." Thor said and rose before leaving the two alone.

"What's your problem what did I do?" she yelled at him.

"It's not you did you ever think of that you mewling quim." he shouted at her before raising on his elbows to see her better.

"Then why did you just leave me hanging. You know I liked you a lot."

"I can't tell you, I can't explain it nor should I have too. I am..." Loki was cut of by sif's warm sweet mouth crashing into his. He felt suffocated, and intoxicated. From his teasing all night his member seemed to have other plans.

Sif saw his arousal and took the oportunity throwing her leg over him she straddled his belly and touched him loki nearly threw her off himself before pinning her to the ground this time he was on top.

"Don't!" he growled.

But it was too late all the teasing and a nice hot offered cunt before him, the thought alone, tugged at his burning hard member. Using one hand he pinned sif's hands down and with the other he freed himself from his pants. Loki looked down at sif's confused face looking for any signs of her not wanting this but all he saw was pure confusion so her pulled her pants down and touched her clit gently with one finger.

"you like that sif?" he asked.

"mmm..." she moaned and nodded.

"Do you want more?"

She nodded again.

"Beg."

"Please."

"Please what"

"Please take me."

"take you where?" loki asked.

"Over the edge were?"

"Loki, Please stop playing games with me." sif begged squirming beneath his touch.

"i said beg!" he yelled.

"Please..."

"Please what you filthy cunt?"

"Please what?!"

"Please fuck me!" she yelled back.

Loki stopped stroking her clit before leaning his face down close to her ear.

"Why should I when you have my brother to pleasure you? You let him remember" and with that he stood and tucked himself away.

He looked down at the still half naked sif, who was in utter shock.

"how...how did you know about that loki.

"I really liked you to sif but I walked in on you and my brother and now your ruined. That's why i've gone and left you."

"Loki I never meant, it was an accident thor and I..."

"how do you accidently sleep with someone. Its impossible. How sif tell me."

tears streamed down her face.

"I...i...don't know."

he turned and walked away leaving sif just as aroused as he was.

Fuming loki entered his room, his body shaking in pure anger. He went straight back to the bathroom and shoved everything off the counter and then covered his face before breaking out into tears.

"why did she...why?"

there was a knock on the door and loki quickly used his gift of illusion to cover himself. "come in."

his mother stepped into the room.

"hello loki, I talked to thor, he told me you an sif got in a fight and he left the party."

"sorry mother."

"what's going in with you loki?"

"what do you mean?"

"you've been keeping to yourself. You've been ignoring sif, thor and your father. Heimdall says you go down to midgard but you won't say were."

loki stood staring at the ground.

"loki please talk to me." she said cupping loki's face in her hands.

"mother I...i just want some time alone is all is that too much to ask?"

"well your father would like to speak to you, thor told him as well. Loki I understand if you need some time on your own but you should of at least told us before we would have given you your space but now, you've caused some issues in the family and your father would like you to get them resolved."

"when should I go see him?"

"I think the sooner the better."

Loki nodded and quickly made his way out of his room and down the great hall to the throne room where his father spent most of his time with his people.

"ah, loki, just the person I wanted to see." Odin piped. "Please close the doors behind you this is personal.

Loki did as he was told and turned slowly to face his father.

"Loki it has been brought to my attention by several of your friends and some of our family members that you have been ignoring them, or if you do pay attention to them you are rude and inconsiderate to their feelings. Now normally I understand you don't really ever care for peoples feelings but your also normally keep those thoughts to yourself. But as of lately those nasty thoughts have come out and have hurt those who are close to you."

"father, i'm sorry i've just had some things bothering me that I haven't really been able to cope with and I just need some time alone."

"But you've had time alone for over three weeks you've been going to midgard, who knows where or why and then you come back crankier than you left, which has led me to believe that the punishment that you mother and I have come up with fits perfectly. You loki of asgard will not leave into any other realm until you have fixed things with your family and those close to you. If you need time alone, you can stay in your room, I will have no one bother you in there, but when you are out you will respect those around you."

"But father I..."

"there are no buts that is final, its over. You will remain in this realm until you fix things."

"yes, father." Loki bowed and turned pulling the throne room doors back open as he left. He went straight to his room and was delighted to find that his mother was not there to talk to him some more. Closing the door he flopped on the bed and pulled his pants down.

"Can't leave the realm, it'll just make things worse since the reason i'm so frustrated is the fact that the one girl I loved cheated on me with my own brother and the next one I find is mortal and I can't touch her, now I can't even see her." He continued his teasings much the same as the night before, this time it was much worse, he needed his release. Jumping up from the bed he pulled his pants back up and pulling on a quick disguise he made himself look like one of the townspeople before leaving. He shuffled through the halls quickly and made his way down to the shore. Grabbing the small motor boat he took off up the shore where the small jump point was from world to world. He would have vivian tonight whether she wanted to be here with him or not.


End file.
